Just too silly for words!

Cthulhu Cultist Teddy Bear

If you go out to the woods today
You won't like what you will find
If you go out to the woods today
You're certain to lose your mind
For every bear that ever there was
Will gather there for certain because
Today's the day the teddy bears summon Cthulhu!

Ritual time for teddy bears!
The little teddy bears are waking the Elder Gods today!
Smell the incense in the air!
And see them dancing their eldritch ballet!
See the waving tentacles
While in their pentacles
They summon your worst nightmares!
And soon their Lord, Great Old One Cthulhu
Will rise up from the sea
Because they're faithful little teddy bears

You could go out to the woods today
With the bears and their evil tome
It's lovely out in the woods today
But safer to stay at home
Beneath the trees where nobody sees
They'll chant and pray as long as they please
Today's the day the teddy bears summon Cthulhu!

--lyrics by Mia Sherman, with apologies to Jimmy Kennedy

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